don't take the 'y' out of funky. when you do, you're left in a funk and you don't know 'y'!

Well, as they say... honesty is the best policy. And frankly, being honest with yourself proves more challenging than with others most times. But if you can overcome the racing thoughts and denial, its a fantastic start to dealing with your emotions. You see, I'm learning how to follow cliché sayings... like practicing what you preach. So now that I've overcome being honest with myself, let me divulge my inner thoughts (not all of them... don't worry!) and tell you, I'm in quite the funk. Homesick... lonely... overwhelmed with reality... just to name a few.  Most of you who know me well enough can attest to this, I'm one of those "I'm fine" people even when I'm really not fine at all. So this is me working diligently to not be that person anymore, and I think I'm doing an alright job. Now, don't get me wrong, I love my job. I sincerely love and care about the people in my Pomeroy life. I've met some absolutely remarkable people since I arrived here. And these individuals certainly make those feelings of isolation ten times more manageable. As I've come to realize, the excitement stage has ended and my routine has become a reality.  In a way, this funk I'm in isn't exactly one of just 'get me out of here'! I mean sure, going to Seattle and being around flocks of people doesn't necessarily help my situation but my thoughts are completely indecisive.... shocking for me, I know (insert sarcasm). Sometimes when I'm in the city I actually feel bored and miss the small town... or maybe just the chaos of the Barne's household. Maybe I attribute this to the fact that I'm alone most times I visit the city. There's only so much exploring you can do and jokes you can say to yourself. And when you literally laugh out loud at your own punniness, people look at you funny. But at the same time I don't want to leave. I want to embrace the culture of Seattle and indulge in all the vegetarian cafes and microbrews. I want to ride my bike through the streets and wear my rain coat all the time. I guess what I'm trying to say is that I've made a great deal of change in my life in a very short amount of time. Graduating from college, becoming a nurse, moving across the country, and being truly independent. I've broken out of my comfort zone completely and I'm proud of myself for doing it, but that doesn't mean it isn't difficult. Change is great, but it sucks too. Deep down, I know this is exactly where I want to be at this point of my life, but it's hard and I'm simply trying to accept that and not put up the "I'm fine" front. And so I don't want my depressive writing to be contagious, let me leave you with a pun. While driving to Yakima I passed by a place called Eureka. I shouted, Eureka I've got it! Turn right at the next exit!